That was funny!
Let's say that it was possible for me to afford a gym membership in the near future... do you think I should join? $200 for a 6-month pass that includes child care? And pool access?
I used to LOVE going to the gym...
LOVE Thinspiration! Also love the "charity" budget, but I have no idea how much one would set aside for that...
I hear you! Mine was all about raising money for a business venture!! I am telling you, this shit is very bizarre, but oh so true! Anyway... my p.c. keeps crashing, I need to do something to do it, my mom keeps telling me, I keep ignoring her. I guess I am going to have to hand it over to my Virgo mother so she can fix for me! I just sent you a text about our new project! I have to get running to the gym so I go bang it out and then go home and work on my the balance sheets for my business plan. Hollie, I really hate this shit, I hate numbers!
BTW... I had to come up with a corporate name for my company... What do you think of "Thinspiration?" At this point I dont give a fuck I just want to get on with it!!
Also, I was thinking in my business plan that I would have a budget for giving to others, you know like vitamins, a free bottle of the stuff, you know whatever maybe someone cant afford one month or something. What do you think? How much do you think it should be per month?
Did you READ my June horoscope? OMG. It's scary... it's talking about EVERY ISSUE I have been anticipating this month... getting my divorce papers signed this weekend and making a career choice in late June/July. It says money is on the way... which is good news. Hopefully that teaching job? And I was just thinking TODAY that I needed to go see my OB/GYN, and it says I need to do that ASAP! It's CRAZY how right on it is!
So I went back and ready the one for May to see how close it actually turned out to be... and it was right on too! Even the "romantic" days, lol. And the way it talked about May being my month to have fun...
Ok, today went REALLY WELL. It was busy, but I stayed focused on my eating and rocked it. Tomorrow is the first day of summer school. I have been saying from jump that I was given this opportunity so I could prove myself, and gain great experience at the same time. Kind of a "make it or break it" opportunity. I hope this leads to me getting a teaching job SOON! I need to take a Praxis exam... and guess what? My horoscope gives me an exact date to when I need to take an important exam...
Some people might think that astrology is for crazy people, but that shit's just too right on!
Your doing an amazing job keeping everything going! One foot in front of the other, one day at a time! Your going to look amazing when you go back to school!! FYI...... The skinny bitch is getting less sex than the one losing weight! People always think the grass greener on the other side.....
p.s. I'm not counting "sexercise" as part of your daily exercise, that's just an added bonus. Feel free to add it as part of your daily routine, anything extra always helps!!!
Went to spend the morning with Libra... SIX HOURS LATER we came up for air, lol. This guy has to be on something...
Needless to say, after a weekend of HOMEWORK and SEX I am soooo tired. But I wanted to check in to let you know I am alive...lol.
At www.giftcertificates.com we can do whats called a SuperCertificate and whoever wins it, can go to the site and trade it in for a list of merchants they have, like if you wanted it to be a specific theme. We can AMEX gift cards, whatever you want. I was thinking.... Maybe every 30 days we have a themed challenge, this way, it gets people cheering eachother on, keeps everyone connected, inspired and most of all ACTIVE and leaving the pounds behind!!
Ok, so now I think we are about to work on our 3rd month together, now it's time to get moving, as in exercise! I have an idea.... what do you think about this?
There is a website called www.introPLAY.com I have belonged for awhile, but stopped logging my stuff awhile ago because I got to busy and forgot to do it. But I think that this is something that you can actually incorporate your readers into. I posted this really great video on my site and I will give you the link from mnbc.com so you can post the video on your site. But, basically the woman lost 140 pounds just by walking. I have gotten a lot of comments from twitter regarding this article.
So here is the idea, you can post the video on your site, and then tell your audience that you have joined the www.introPLAYcom site to log your walking, and that you have put a group together (you can do directly on the site & call it some great name) and want to do a 30 day challenge to (whatever you want, walk the farthest, lose the most weight, etc) and are giving away a $50 gift card (I will donate to the group, tax write off for me now - gift card can be whatever you would like to give away) as the prize. I will also let my twitter followers know what you are doing. People have nothing to lose except "weight" on this challenge!
The site is very cool, you can join other challenges, and you log all your stuff, it even charts your workouts and shows you the progress! It is a great motivator when you really dont feel like doing jack, you know! :-)
I think this will help to get you going and to be accountable to logging something even if it is only 10 or 15 minutes. Not only will you be getting in your exercise you will again be leading the way to a group who wants to do what you have done. You are there inspiration... As a leader you must keep climbing, so get your tennis shoes on girl, cause were going to the next level. I honestly think you can break 100 pounds lost by the time summer is over, I know you can, I just know it!!
I am so happy that you feel good about your life and that you are living your life while losing weight! You just seem so happy and remind me of sunshine in your pictures. I really like the pink that you are wearing, in the picture, you seriously look like you are beaming with happiness and you have such a beautiful smile, your face just lights up!! No wonder you have so many readers now, you truly are an inspiration to others!
I was so proud of you that you were able to get in touch with a divorce attorney and disfigurement was not the price! Most women look like shit by the time they file for a divorce, but you my dear friend are the epitomy of beauty right now. You know this could not represent a bigger sign that you are most definately going in the right direction with your life. This has to make you feel good inside. You are truly on your way to unleashing the queen you are within!
I want you to know that I have shown everyone your pictures and they think you are doing an incredible job, and everyone over here is CA is cheering for you. I almost feel like you are my child and I am breaking out the wallet photos or something!
I feel as though I have been a really bad guider to you lately, and I wanted to tell you Im sorry!! These past few weeks have been really rough for me going back and forth with all this stuff with this pill and stuff with my job. Plus, I really miss Peter Pan through all of this. Not because I really miss him but because we had always talked about when I became a psychologist and how he would help me open up my practice. I always knew I would open up some type of business and I always thought that HE would be MY guider. But as all of this is happening he is anything but here. It kind of made me not sad, but I guess blue, that as all this is going on, he isnt here for me to share it with. But I guess this is how the universe wanted it to be, whatever lessons I am to learn I guess I had to learn them on my own without him. I guess I had to learn how to raise money and find investors on my own. But I really wished that he was here so I could tell him about it you know.
Within the next six months I am going to get back in school and finish everything up. I am going to finish up the degrees and I am going to get my personal trainers certificate. I feel as though I need to have as many things as I can to give me credibility. You know I feel like my life has changed so drasticallyin the last month. I feel as though I am at the top of the roller coaster and my life is about ready to go about 100 mph! I am really excited and at the same time really kind of scared. Its almost like I feel as though fate has really entered my life. There is a lot of change coming up in my life I can see it. Plus, I am going to have to give up my freedom car, this is how I know big change is coming my way.
I know you wont believe this but exactly two years ago this past mothers day, I sold my Mercedes that was only 18 months old, that I had specially ordered and paid for, yes girl, all by myself, because you know that is how I roll.... for a used, 1 year old at the time, Honda Civic! Of course it was a top of the line, which means umm... not much, but a sunroof and electric windows, I had satellite radio put in and I basically I drove the fuck out this car. In 2 years I put 80,000 miles on the car.... umm. yeah, I literally am never home! But it was my freedom car because, it wasnt a lease I could jump in it and go anywhere, anytime, with whomever, I could do whatever I wanted. I cant tell you how many sunrises and sunset's over the desert that I saw while I was driving that car back and forth from California to Arizona. Every time I saw them I felt so free on the inside! Now that Joey will drive in October I will give him the civic and get, yes, you guessed it another lease. Time to re-enter real life once again. I guess after two years off I am ready for the journey ahead!
Sometimes I really wished you lived in LA so we could hang out, smoke cigarettes, drink lemon drops and chat for hours!
I got your text earlier, asking about how I feel. Sorry... I was driving and my phone was going dead - so I thought I would blog it instead. Bottom line is that I feel awesome right now. Physically, I think I've come a long way. 50 lbs is still less than 1/3 of the total weight loss I need to achieve, but it's made a huge difference. I've went from a size 28 to a size 22. I feel so much more confident, though. I no longer think that everyone is staring at me because I'm so fat. Now, I think people are staring at me because I'm HOT! I like the way I feel in my clothes. I love wearing heels and not having my feet hurt after 5 minutes. I love being able to look at myself in the mirror. And I found out yesterday that I even like taking pictures now!
The past couple of weeks I know I have not been as focused on my weight loss as I should have, but I think that LIFE has just got in the way a little. The great thing, though, is that just because life got the front seat for a minute, I did not throw my weight loss efforts to the curb! I think I was able to do BOTH pretty well. I celebrated my birthday, I ended the school year, and I dealt with family issues and stress without losing sight of my weight loss goals. I think the main reason I am able to do this now is because I have changed HABITS that lead to my downfall every time.
Things like "treating" myself to a candy bar. Or drinking too many sodas to stay awake. Or eating fast food too much. And basically just saying, "I'll start over tomorrow." Fuck that! I'm not starting over ANYTHING... I will keep on keeping on no matter what! I will NOT eat that candy, and I will NOT drink that soda, because it's not worth it. Yeah, it might be easier to go drive-thru or order pizza, but that extra effort it takes to prepare a healthy meal is crucial to my success.
I WILL be successful this time. Something in me makes me know it. And I also think I will help other people get there, too. I don't know if I ever told you this, but over a year ago, the ex and I were sitting on the porch having a discussion about the future. We were broke, and basically brainstorming about what kind of home-based business we could get started in. At the time, we had different goals for this business. My goal was to help people and be inspiring, and his goal was to turn a profit. I told him that it would be great if I could find a "diet pill" that actually worked, start taking it and lose a lot of weight, then help other women lose weight by also taking this pill. Then we could start selling the pill - but first it had to be a product that we both believed in. I would blog about it along the way, but basically be a walking advertisement. He agreed it was a good idea, and we did do research. But he wanted to find "any" pill that was cheap and easy to buy in bulk. I wanted to find a pill that actually worked, that I could put my name behind. Like most of our ideas - it never came to fruition.
This is what I always think about when I think of Kandee. I think it's meant to be...
Sell.... You are the greatest at it!! I think maybe you just dont know it! What you really sell is yourself, that's what you sell and.... ummmm.... currently, you are doing a GREAT job! The thing is, yes, people buy the product, but they are really buying you!
For me I am not a sales person at all, but when it comes to this stuff it's my life, it's all I know. Plus, this will happen to you, as it has already begun. But, people are always asking me how I maintain my weight and figure @ almost 40, how do you stay in shape, how do you do this, etc. So for me, what has happened is that people I have sold the pill to, they are more than just a customer, they call me over anything that has to do with weight loss. I wouldnt say that I am "friends" with them, but they are more than just an exchange of money. I really want to see people lose weight and enjoy life and they know it. This is what sets me apart from others!
This my friend is exactly what is going to happen to you. Remember when I said that you would help people, way better than I could because you would have actually done it.... your time is coming! So in essence you arent really going to have sell anything, you are just going to be sharing your story and telling them the truth and how you did it. It was with an epidural and a lot of "hard work!"
But the real secret, in my opinion, which you have already learned and done is learning to live your life and lose weight at the same. You are living proof that it CAN be done! You love to chat, and people want someone to listen to them when they are at the store, like you text me, people will send you menu's before they go out, like you sent me. Think about all the stuff you asked me for help on, or wanted advice on.... You see, in a few months you are going to have your own group of women to mentor who will be at the same exact place you were when I met you. You see how all of this that started with just you and I, will end up touching and changing the lives of many other people?
This is why I told you I never cared about the money or sending you what I sent you. I was mostly interested in seeing you reach your goals, and in turn, you to help other women achieve their goals, and so on and so on....
You know, I think I could make it down at least another 30 - 40 during the summer. That's 15 to 20 lbs per month. The way I see it is if I can lose weight while I'm not giving 100%, then I can sure as hell lose weight when I'm giving it 100%. It's time that I get my ass in gear, and REALLY start to focus like I was when I first started this plan. Yeah, things have been stressful, and a lot has gone on this past month. But the way I look at it, I LOVE the way I feel right now, and getting more weight off will only make me look better. And hey... I'm going to be a walking advertisement for Kandee! I have to look the part! Like you said, I am building our client base NOW. I am not a strong salesman, but if I look the part, the product will sell itself.
South Beach sounds great! But I don't know about the month-long thing just yet. It will be hard for me to do with young kids... I don't trust anyone I know to care for them for that long. But in future, hell yeah!
I am actually off for a walk right now. My I-pod is charged, and the sun is out! I am supposed to be meeting someone for a drink this afternoon. I'm not quite sure I SHOULD be, but I am... I'll tell you about him later.
And about the phone... Clyde also has a prepaid plan with Verizon and doesn't pay much more than I do. But he has unlimited Web, so if I can't use your phone with Cricket, I may just change carriers. Most will let you keep your phone number now, so hopefully it won't be hard. I feel the need to TWITTER!
Later!
Did you get my text yesterday about your pictures?? I replied to your text saying...... that I thought you looked absolutely AMAZING!!! SMOKIN HOT, my friend!!! I think you will be down another 50 pounds by the time school begins once again!!
I was dying when you told me about WW and how you told them to keep going to weight watchers over the summer and then you would tell them, girl.... You are so funny and totally the greatest!! You are totally building up your customer base, and these chicks will buy from you every month which is re-curring revenue! Your going to make BANK!! Do you like to travel? I LOVE, LOVE to travel and I want to do this trip, but you will be gone for 1 month! I want you to look it up. Shirley McClaine did it, it's called the Camino. It is in Spain and it is a 500 mile walk, its under the Milky Way. It's a very transformational trip. People say that when you do it you come back a different person, but you walk it, 500 miles in 30 days! If you were physically fit, would you do it? I want to do it, just not by myself!
I didnt hit the gym last night, due to drama that I had to deal with, so I ended up having dinner with some other people to clear some stuff up... BUT, yes, I did hit the 5:30 am spin class this morning and after I get my bodily maintenance done after work I will hit it again. If I am going to sell Pink Kandee I've got to look like one fine Mother Fucker!!! Plus, I dont know why but South Beach, Miami, Florida is calling my name lately. I spent a lot of time there when we bought our second boat. We we flew back and forth for 3 months and took the boat out to the Bahamas and the Keys, until Hurricane Season and then had the boat shipped home through the Panama Canal. Have you ever been there? If not..... get ready to go there within the next year, wearing really cute tank-tee's that say, "I Love Pink Kandee!" Im trying to come up with different slogans.
I have to run have a great day!! Love, love, love your new clothes! You look fabulicious!!! Try to get 3 walks in this week, 1 more than last week, just fit it in!!! South Beach girl is calling our name..................................
p.s. Im just gonna mail you the phone and all the stuff it comes with. If it doesnt work, Im sure you can find something to do with it.
Chat with you soon!
Y.
I just had to write first! Today has been busy, but I've got a lot done. Still no school work! Damn! BUT... I did find out the name of the lawyer I used the last time I filed for divorce. He used to have a "payment plan" - you pay a couple hundred up front, and then a little more each month as things progress. I need to file for divorce ASAP! So tomorrow, after I deal with taking my cuckoo-for-cocoa-puffs mother to the doctor, I am going to check into it. But no signing anything until next month! I remember!
Eating has been good today, but I did have a lot of cravings again. I think it's just because I'm at home - and out of my usual routine for too long. Well, I went to Wal-mart and stayed strong! Yeah, I wanted candy, I wanted pizza, and something else (don't even remember now). But I said NO - FUCK NO! I'm in a 22 damn it! Did you like my pictures? Hell, I liked them! And that's SO unusual for me! Over the past couple of days I have thought more than once that I looked HOT! LOL
So, you know how some people post their meals on Twitter? I was thinking of maybe doing something like that, because YOU keep me accountable? What do you think? I am going to the Cricket store tomorrow to ask about that phone. The store in my town is run by idiots, so I want to go to the one in the city so I have a chance they'll know what their talking about. I have heard from a couple of people that if a phone has been flashed from another network it might not work. In that case, I'll just see how much a new phone is. Or I can also shop around on Ebay to see if I can find one that's already a Cricket. I'll let you know by tomorrow.
Yesterday at my last WW meeting, a few people approached me and asked me how I stuck to plan and lost so much weight. Well, I told them I was NOT doing WW anymore, and that I had help from other areas. When they wanted to know what it was, I told them to stick with WW over the summer, and if they still didn't have success, I'd share my secret. They were DYING to know! I figure that when I come back to school in Aug. even thinner, they will be ready to talk about Pink Kandy? Showing is better than telling, in my opinion...
Later chick!
So I went and joined all these other blogs which I will ping and it will automatically post to but I need you to go in and decorate them all and have people join them. I will send you a list of them, your good at the decoration part, I suck at that kind of shit!
Hey Girl -
Dont ever worry about neglecting me, remember I am really a man on the inside, I am totally not needy or catty like most chicks! Just thinking about being like, I think I would want to blow my brains out!! I am so glad that you have been having a whole week of fun, this is how life is supposed to be. You see, weight loss is JUST a personal goal, in your case the top goal, but it doesnt define you and now, no longer rules your life or the fun factor and for that I am so happy that you are actually "living" your life along those lines. When you wake up in the morning, life should seem so much more exciting because you now have so many things to look forward too!!!
I received the contract from the manufacturing company. I am having my legal department look it over to see if it is o.k. to sign. I actually wont be signing it until next Monday because the Mercury Retrograde wont be over until Saturday and you are not supposed to sign anything during that time and I sure as hell dont want to have re-do any of this contract shit. I even told my rep the reason I wasnt signing until next week. I told him I may be a fuckin wacko, but I am thin healthy, and smokin' hot wacko!! :-) He agreed! Funny, people will say anything for new business!
I am back on track with my gym routine, thank god! My one girlfriend who is about 12 years younger than me, who is getting a divorce and just as nutty about the gym as I am moved a few miles for me, totally great! She holds me accountable for the gym! Yesterday we did 80 minutes of cardio and this morning I hit a 5:30 am spin class! Yes, I feel off the fuckin chart. With all the work that lie ahead of me I have to be on top of my game and working out twice per day helps me to stay exactly there, on top!
Wanted to let you know with respect to twitter, what I began doing was taking our conversations off this blog from day one and have been posting them line by line a little at a time, like we are having a conversation, so this has kind of got the ball rolling with it. At first we got some real, well "shady" people, I think we because we say the word "fuck" in our conversations but it has since mellowed out which is good. I mean, mellowed out with the freaks!
Let me know if you want me to send you that phone so I can put it in the mail. I have never heard of cricket. We have AT&T & Verizon in California.
I think thats all for now, chat with you soon!
I feel like I've totally neglected my favorite CHICK over the past couple of days! So sorry! I have been having WAY too much fun, and tonight is the first night I'm actually AT HOME long enough to blog and take care of business! It's been a fun week, but it's time to get back to some sort of normalcy.
I really need to study and get some assignments done ASAP. And I also need to devote some time to navigating around Twitter so I can be more familiar with it. I need to check into getting a wireless router for my home computer so I can use my laptop to get online. If I had a computer that was more mobile I'd do better. But I tend to get STUCK in my bedroom when I come in here to get on the computer throughout the day. I'll figure something out...
My birthday was so good. Libra took me to dinner and a movie last night, then I spent the night with him. Yes, it was mind-blowing again. An awesome start to my birthday! Today has been mostly working in my lawn and soccer practice. Tomorrow I am going to clean out my garage and try to nail down a summer job! I am wasting too much time! I have GOT to focus!
OK, so on your last blog post you had so many comments on reaching the 50 lb mark, you are doing off the chart! You have become an inspiration to sooooo many people. Did you notice how many readers that you have now? This has really been a GREAT month for you!! I hope you got my ecard I sent last night? It was from pingg.com, you will have to let me know.
I worked on the blog all day yesterday, submitted to a lot of places and got the twitter going. Last I checked we were at 150 followers. I couldnt get the flash to work on my laptop so I still have to fix the twitter page. Bizarre, I dont know why it wasnt working..
So the manufacturing company wanted to restate that the $500 I spent each time to have the pill formula matched, well.... only the $500 that is spent on the batch that is actually a match is what get's credited. So, if it takes 3 times before getting it right, $500 each time, = $1500, only the formula that works will get credited. Basically I would be out $1000, but I know in the long run it will be worth it! It better be!!
I am soooo tired, my monthly bill is here and today is going to be my first day back in the gym in almost two weeks. It is going to kick my ass large! But I gotta get back on track!
Hope you are having a happy, happy birthday today!
Chat with you soon!
Yes, I am a slug. I have no energy. I am so sleepy I just almost fell out of my chair when I fell asleep at the computer, lol. Last night was pretty much a bust. Yeah, we went out, but we were all still reeling from Jess's bad news. There were 5 of us gals, we went to a club, paid $20 to get in, and it was so-so. I was "cute t0 death" though (that's a ghetto-fab term, I think). I had on my NEW size 22 denim crops with a cute T-shirt and killer heels. Guys were trying to talk to me as soon as we got in the club. And this is not on "old" club - probably 30 and under crowd. (Yes, Jess likes to hang out with the younger crowd. Our club-mates were all 22 - 25!)
I got up early (after 2 hours of sleep) to meet Libra after he got off from work. The plan was to do breakfast, then go to the movies or something. Yeah, right. We got back to his place at around 8:30 a.m. - he was out of the shower by 8:45 a.m. Then... we basically went at it like rabbits until about 2 p.m.! OMG! We kept stopping, and saying were gonna go eat, but then we decided we were more horny than hungry. Needless to say, I wasn't thinking about my metabolism during this time. I didn't eat until late afternoon before I picked my kids up from the Ex. I haven't taken ONE supplement today, no even my EZ (forgot my baggies). But I only had a small vodka/cranberry last night - just wasn't in the mood to get drunk.
SO... tomorrow is "get your ass in gear day". No solid Memorial Day plans - Libra and I are going to do SOMETHING... just don't know what yet. I am def. going to sleep in and play catch-up on my ZZZZ's.
And on the Jess thing - she just moved out April 1, so this ho was preggo before Jess even left her hubby. She is filing for divorce Thurs. She said she can't take the chance this bitch will file for child support before she can. She's going to take his ass to the cleaners. And she was about to move back home with him to work things out! Now, she's just going to move back home - and put him out! But she's so down... I'm worried about her.
OMG...... drama, drama, and more drama!!! How is Jess holding up, she must feel like someone ran her over with a MAC truck, she is getting it at every angle! Does she have any good drugs like Xanex, Valium or LorTab? Yes, girlfriend needs all the help she can get right now!! Ummm..., 10 weeks, that means she is almost 3 months? Does the chick have any other children? How long have Jess and her husband been split up? Are they officially divorced? Would she go back to him? My head is spinning....
You on the other hand.... are playing in the sandbox of a single women and what a sandbox it is!! Isnt it so great when your choices are guy #1, guy #2, or guy #3?? Life is so much better when you have options!! This is going to be a birthday that you never forget, regardless of which guy you spend it with, or even if you spend it with all three! :-)
I am getting ready to get in the shower, I am going over to my girlfriends house to lay by the pool (with a huge hat and sunglasses, so I dont fuck my skin up) and write out my business plan, did I ever tell you I FUCKING HATE numbers? If I didnt, I am telling you now! My girlfriend has an M.B.A. in finance, uuummm...., yeah so she is going to help me, I really hate this part! Did I ever tell you this is why I dropped out of school right before I got my undergrad in business? Yeah, after I did a presentation on management and told the class I was never going to manage anyone because I didnt want to babysit, the teacher asked me how I was going to make money and climb the corporate ladder if I wasnt going to manage - because that was the only way to do it? It was catastrophic, I dropped out of school.... and went back 5 years later to begin working on my undergrad in psychology, now.... I want to change it to fitness and nutrition.... O.K., can you tell committment is hard for me? Who the fuck cares, in a few years I will have them all!!
Let me know if that phone will work for you, if it will I am going to mail it out on Tuesday when I get back to my office. It feels like I havent been there in forever, I havent slept in my own bed in I think in 12 days, fuck, I am a bag lady, I am literally living out of bags! Lancome, Aveda, Guess and Bebe that is...
p.s. good job on the hour walks - - keep doing it everyday! This is why you need that phone, so you can write or audio post while your walking, makes the time go by so much faster, plus you really learn how to develop your peripheral vision!!
Ok... just got back from an hour-long walk! Tired as hell, but feel so good.
Got home and Jess called. She just found out that her husband has got another woman pregnant! She's 10 FUCKING WEEKS along, and he's known about it for over a month! All this time he's been begging Jess to come home, promising he's not seeing this woman. Prick!
Sounds like you've got a good plan as to what to do with your dad. I have no doubt that you can hold it down and make sure everything goes off like you plan. I am so excited for you!
Ok... I am running SO behind today. Gotta shower, then go to the grocery and get my kids packed to go with Clyde tonight. And I still NEED to go to Lane Bryant and Old Navy b/c I don't have anything to WEAR! And I still don't know what the fuck I'm doing tonight! Muscles wants me to come over there - which I am not unless it's the last resort. This guy "Chris" wants me to go out with him. And then Tony just called and wants me to go out with him! Tony is the guy who I have been unable to resist for some time. He's a Libra, lol. Oh, and I'm meeting Libra in the morning at 7 a.m. when he gets off from work and going home with some "quality time" with him.
See, I do not want to be a skank. I know if I go see Tony, we're fucking. I know if I go see Muscles, we're fucking. And I am definitely planning on fucking Libra tomorrow! SO, see what I mean? Maybe I can just hang with Jess and we can do something that will def. take her mind of her lying-ass husband, and I can celebrate my birthday at the same time? And not involve men? And get get me in early enough so I can look great when I meet my Libra in the a.m.? AHHHH!
Trust me I know what your saying to be very true! In fact, I really dont want to go into business with anyone, because I have been through and seen so much crap when it comes to that. Hell, I dont want even want to be legally married or fenced in by another person. I like the freedom to do my own thing whenever I want! BUT....
My dad has pushed this, and he is the one that is going to sell it, which makes the profit. So what I have decided to do is legally structure it where I own 60% and he own's 40%. Because he has bad credit and does not know how to handle money, I will have it legally written in our agreement nothing will be in his name, everything will be in mine. He will not have access to any funds, any bank accounts, he wont be able to buy anything on the company. I am just going to write him a check every month for what percentage wise is his and he can do whatever he wants with his own money. I think this maybe something along the lines of a silent partner. Basically, he cant make any decisions, however if the company were to be sold then he would get 40% of the profits, which I would give him 50%. He has zero business sense and sometimes doesnt make good choices, so I cant have the consequences of those choices destroy my business. I figure as long as I just write him checks for money he has earned it should be good.
When I told him this he flipped out. He said he wasnt going to do it. I said o.k. then he changed his mind and said he would. I told him if he was good for 36 months and didnt have ANY crisis, and did not bounce any checks in his personal bank account and could be a "good citizen" I would consider a different arrangement. See, I know all about being the parent and him being the child!
Chat with you soon!
I don't know a lot about business, but I know better than to EVER do business with family members. If you have another friend that will do this with you, I'd go that route. And doing things the RIGHT way is always good. Make everything legal.
Sorry I have been a stranger-chick today - it's been CrAzY! Work was fun today. We had an "end of the year" banquet with the whole district, and it was BORING. So my co-teacher and several other teachers started cutting up to entertain ourselves. If you think I'm funny, you should hear me with my sidekick co-worker, lol. We started making sexual comments and that got everyone going. It might have got him going to? He asked me out for a drink after work, and then we asked two other teachers we thought were cool. I ordered a margarita with Patron, and he insisted they upgrade it to the best stuff. Then he also got me a shot (which was really a double) so we could do a shot together.
By the time the other two women got there I felt like I had an epidural, lol! Then I had to rush off to get my youngest from daycare, so when I asked for my check he said that he had my drinks put on his tab. When I told him he didn't have to do that - he insisted. Said that's why he upgraded my Patron. Maybe he wants to fuck me? (Why do I always think that because a man is nice to me he wants to fuck me?) I didn't feel "drunk" until after I got home, then it was more sleepy than anything else. I fell asleep and didn't wake up until I heard Jess walk in an hour or so later.
So I know that alcohol is not good for my diet, but I've been trying to make the best of it. I'm still eating clean - no sugar, no caffeine. Now, in the past, when I fell off in ANY area of my diet, I would just say "fuck it" and let everything go. But I am trying to allow myself to have fun since it's my birthday. I don't want to un-do my hard work, though. Tomorrow night should be the end of the alcohol. And I MAY not drink then. Libra gets off work at 7 a.m. Sunday, and I'm following him home to "put him to bed." So since he doesn't drink I really don't want to smell like I've been in a bar all night, ya know?
I'll do something because the EX-hole is taking the kids for the first time tomorrow night. A night of FREEDOM? For me? I'll believe it when it really happens. He gave me a whopping $50 today for child support, too. Joy!
OK... I have to be at work at 7:30 in the a.m. to pass out report cards. Then going straight to the soccer field. Then straight to Lane Bryant! Then to the grocery store so I can stock up on f/v. I have got to eat by the book again starting Sunday. The scale this morning had me down 2 lbs. since Monday, so I'm trying to keep it moving in the right direction!
So, after going through everything I went through yesterday I know that this is going to be too much for me. I need to get a partner and I know who I am going to get. Plus, this girl is into fitness like I am and will front the other half of the money which will be nice. Well of course my dad flipped out....
My dad is shady, yes he can sell, but you know what I am talking about. If he started a business, it would never stand up in a court of law because nothing would have been done right. He thinks you can just manufacturer a product, slap a lable on it and start selling it. Yes, the idiots can do that, but the smart and successful people do their homework prior, cross all the t's and dot all the i's and are prepared should anything happen. These are the companies that succeed! Plus, I have only worked for very successful bankers in the past! I told him I know what the fuck I am talking about. This is the right way to do things.
He said that I am just afraid and that I am not willing to take a risk. I said I am not afraid to take a risk, but I am not stupid either! I said in 3 weeks, I have to shell out ten thousand dollars, not you dad, but me! I dont think that is called "NOT" taking a risk! I said I am going to fork it out, but unfortunately the bank roll doesnt stop there, this is what is called the cost of doing business. I said I have to have a plan, I have to write it out. He said we have a plan, I said a plan on paper dad. He said, no you dont! I said yes, you do, this is the first thing they teach you in business school! He said we have a plan, I said dad its fly by night! He said I cant just say how much I am going to sell, I said dad you can do worst case and best case scenario this is what's called "forecasting!" He thinks I am crazy but I know I am not. The thing is I am going to have an agreement drawn up by an attorney like a pre-nup that states if the partnership were to dissolve who would get what, such as I would take the my name, etc.
I knew this would happen with him. I just know I can trust the guy. Plus, I know that he is just being greedy and I am not like that. Yes, I want to make money but I also want to be successful and do things the right way. I dont want to do things the wrong way out of greed. I am not that type of person!
how to add this to our blog posts? I am really bad at this kind of stuff... http://tiny.cc/1hR8l
I found this new site toldya.com, it is like ebay and amazon except it is a store that you can sell all your stuff and put your store on your facebook account. You can decorate it with multi-media and a bunch of other fun stuff!
...about Kandy! (remember that old LL Cool J hit?) I am SO excited about this pill! Shit! You are officially an entrepreneur!
Girl, yes, I dragged my hungover ass into work, but it is the last day for students, and we only had 1 kid in the classroom! I just steered away from the office as much as I could, but my co-worker assured me I didn't smell like a bar, lol. He would know! I was def. sober on the way to work... I stopped drinking at about 1 a.m.
I did hear from Muscles last night. He texted me while we were out saying he fell asleep. What-the-fuck-ever! The show has already moved on. I didn't even text him back, then he called me today on my way home from work and didn't even mention last night. My cell went dead and I haven't talked to him since. But tonight is Bike Night, so he'll be wrapped around his fucking motorcycle for the rest of the night.
Jess's husband is very nice - one of the coolest men you'll ever meet. So laid back, and he gave Jessica every thing she wanted and more. He worked 7 days per week, 12 hours per day. He got laid off a couple of months ago, and I felt bad for the guy b/c she left him right when that happened. But he must be doing some kind of hustle because he is still paying her $650 truck note and daycare for the kids. I think they'll always be friends - but after seeing them together last night I know they still love each other.
My last day of work is actually Saturday. I have to go in for a Teacher work day tomorrow all day, and then for a few hours on Sat. for the kids to get their report cards. But I brought home the laptop and the Wii today since I think we are going to be out of the building a lot tomorrow at another school. Still haven't heard from Target, and Clyde is a worthless piece of shit. I'm going to call Target again in the morning first thing.
I don't plan to go shopping until Saturday, I guess. I also got a 20% off coupon online from LB for my birthday - so that's an extra bonus. Buying an entire outfit should NOT be a problem. I texted back and forth a lot with Libra last night and this a.m. and I think he's def. still interested. We are supposed to go out Monday - and I can wear my outfit then.
Get some sleep Chick! I just took a nap in a damn lounge chair in my back yard while my kids were playing, lol. I feel much better!
OK, I have been up since yesterday @ 7:00 am, I am fucking exhausted!! BUT, not as tired as you are, as I do not have any kids to take care of, thank god those days are behind me... But I do know what that feels like and I am glad I am past it!!
I am sooooooooooo happy that you got your gift certificate in the mail. Did you already go down and buy what you wanted? Im excited for you to get something new especially on this birthday, as you have hit your goal weight and deserve something new!!
Girl, how in the hell did you go to work this morning? I thought your last day was the day before that. I have been up for way to many hours I literally feel like I am walking dead! Your night last night sounds like it was totally worth the hangover, but throwing up and going to work, girl, how close do you get to those kids??? Were you still drunk on your way to your work, you know like you could get a DUI going to work? Did you take any pictures. I LOVE drag queens, they are so very entertaining and funny as hell!
Jess' husband sounds really nice. It sounds like they are still friends that is really nice especially since they have kids together (even if they are not, still nice). So is today your last day at work then? I would think if you got the laptop. Have you heard anything back on any jobs? How is that going? Will Clyde give you any money? Did you ever hear from the muscles asshole?
Well, I went to the lab this afternoon. I have officially moved foward with my pill. I will have samples in the next 3 weeks, in which I will give 3 pills to all my people to see how they like it, anything different, good, bad, etc. Once I have the formula down, then they will reproduce the pill in a little bottle and guess what??? Yes, the pill will be hot pink!! It should be ready to go to market by end of summer, around labor day weekend. Yes, I totally wish it was sooner, but I have a lot of work to do on it. The best part is that the lab is approved, licensed, with all the insurances that FDA requires and recommends. I am so, so, so excited!!!
So my dad, who you know has been a drug user and alcoholic my whole life but managed to work and send me to private school is going to sell the product for me. Actually, he really cant do anything but "sell." He has never worked for a salary only commission his whole life. You know the man is good when he makes $100K selling appliances and t.v.'s. Anyway, he is almost without a job and he is the one that has really pushed me on this pill thing as I have been so tired with all that has been going on lately. So I have to order the mininum amount which is 100K pills, yes, you heard me right, that is 3,330 bottles. My dad is going to sell by the cases and he will find distributers for the pill. I am so excited!!!
What did you think of the twitter page, I have to go in and finish it, but its coming along. I couldnt copy the chicks picture off of our page, it said I was denied access. We have 33 followers now! Yeah!!
I am about to drop dead of sleep deprivation so I will write later I need to take a nap!!!
Write later tonight! :-0
and that was only the beginning! I tell you what, I end up in some of the craziest damned circumstances sometimes, lol. OK - so you know I went to hang out with Jess last night, and had a booty call in mind. So I talked to Muscles before I left my house and told him I'd call him around 8 p.m. to let him know when I'd be there. So around 9 p.m. (yeah, I was late) I called him and got no answer. Called again. Texted. Called again. Sent final text. Fuck it!
So as soon as I told Jess my plans had changed, she jumped up and said that she wanted to go somewhere. Right before that, her husband called and told her that he was going to $1 longneck night at our favorite bar. So she told him that I was going out, and he told me that if I stopped by the bar he'd buy me a drink. I knew she wanted to go to the bar with me so she could see if he was here with another woman, or the same woman he's been seeing (a total skank Btw...). So, while I was getting ready, she remembered that it was Drag Show night at this gay bar she goes downtown. She's been wanting me to see a "real" drag show, so I was game.
It was SO much fun! I had a vodka/cranberry and it hit me like a ton of fucking bricks! I was feeling the funk by the time we left the show and went to the bar. So when we walk in, her hubby was pleased to see BOTH of us - and so were his friends and everyone else there that remembers when we were all regulars several years ago. So the drinks started rolling in.... Jess's hubby immediately brought me a Long Island Tea (my usual), and I thought I would be "good" by only drinking that. But remember... I was already buzzed from the vodka/cranberry. Bottom line, I HAD A FUCKING BALL! OMG! And can I also mention that Jess's husband is fine as hell! I don't know what the fuck she is thinking sometimes! He is not only good-looking, but he is so fucking cool to hang out with.
When we left, the plan was to go eat at IHOP. Even drunk off my ass - I knew there was no way in hell I was going to eat that shit. But my stomach was feeling queezy, and I had only eaten a protein bar for dinner. By the time we got to the truck, Jess and I decided to ditch the guys and go to Steak and Shake. But my mind wasn't on food - I was going to be sick! OMG! So I rode with my head hanging out the window - and Jess ordered me a kids hamburger meal because I "needed something on my stomach." But even drunk, I knew that eating that fatty/bad carb-laden food was only going to make it worse. I chewed a french fry - and spit it out the window. I couldn't even swallow it! (ha ha that's a first)
I made it home, and slept with my face on the toilet seat for a while. Then I stuck my finger down my throat and vomited... then fell back to sleep. I dragged my ass to the couch at 4 a.m. Then was back up at 6:15 to get my kids ready to go to school. Notice I didn't say I got ready for work - because I'm still wearing the fucking outfit I wore last night, lol! All I did was rinse my contacts, brush my teeth, and brush my hair. My makeup was still perfectly preserved, lol. So here I am at work - smelling like a bar, with bloodshot eyes. But otherwise I feel okay, just not ready to eat yet. So I just had a few strawberries and am eating a LUNA bar. I also brought some organic yogurt for later and am chugging water.
But it was worth it!
This afternoon has just gone to shit! Five fucking minutes before the bell rang, I had a problem with my only female student. Long story short, she got mad about me not giving her cell phone back to her (because I needed to call Greg about it first since he left early) and she went ape shit and walked out. I got her back in the classroom just as the principal and a police officer came in after her. She starts fighting them, they had to handcuff her (which took FOREVER because she was fighting them). I was the only person she would reason with, so I had to escort her to the office and wait with her until her Mom came. I am the only person she trusts, and the only person who could keep her calm. My nerves are shot to SHIT!
Ok... here's the story on Jess. Jess and I have been friends since high school. We are more sisters than friends - she is closer to me than any of my family. And since she really doesn't have any family either - we are very close. She has four boys - ranging from 9 to 2. The weekend I left Clyde, I went to stay with her and her husband. This is when she told me she had been seeing another WOMAN for several months, and was leaving her husband. She left him back in March. Her girlfriend and I get along great, but she's CRAZY. Very insecure, totally emotional. See, Jess is like us - she's a guy! She is never emotional, doesn't like drama. So over the past couple of months this girlfriends has been doing some psycho shit and is totally possessive. She is jealous over Jess's husband or any other guy she talks to.
So, since Jess and her husband NEVER argued, Jess basically said fuck all this drama and broke it off with her last Tuesday. Jess is totally in love with this chick, but knows the relationship isn't healthy already. Well, the girlfriend won't let it go - you get the picture. So, since Jess insists that she is in love it's tearing her up. I have NEVER seen her so distraught over anything. She wasn't even this fucked up about leaving her husband (which she left because he will fuck anything that moves). So I am going to try to talk to her tonight, and spend some time with her so she won't be alone. She's ALWAYS there for me, so I have to be there for her.
Ok, Muscles is just an asshole. Which I already knew. I think he really likes me more than he wants to admit. Hell, I don't really know - don't care. But he's young (28) and spoiled and has no tact at all. But he's cute - and has a nice package - and there's something about his hateful ass that gets my blood pumping. But after I told his ass off last night, he texted me today and asked me if I would come over. And I know I probably will - since my kids will be at Jessica's anyway. I will comfort her, then I'll go get laid and come back and comfort her some more, lol. Hey, Jess will understand!
Libra is still around - he just works at night. I kinda feel like he's cooled off a little, but it could be my insecurity talking. He asked me out on Monday (his off day), and I was feeling pissy and turned him down. Honestly, I didn't feel like driving all the way the fuck out there! So, he told me yesterday that he's going home (to Memphis) on Sunday, but wanted to know if he could see me on Monday, which I agreed to. After all, my damned birthday is Tuesday! And he already told me it was going to be special...
I was going to take a picture of me in my dress, but since I had to tussle on the ground with the student until my hair was messed up and my boobs were falling out, I don't think so... The one damned day in the past two months I take the time to flat-iron my hair...
Oh, and the pizza party was good. I didn't eat any, then went over to my daughter's BBQ at her school. I brought my lunch salad along with me and ate that while I watched them play kick-ball. This afternoon before Greg left the class was STILL eating pizza, chips, Ding-Dongs, and Coca Cola. There was about 1 1/2 pizzas left, and I actually brought it home for my kids to have for dinner so it wouldn't go to waste. I don't even want that shit so it's not an issue. I was so fucking on edge, though, after I left this afternoon I could have binged BIG TIME! Could have - but didn't want to. I smoked a cig instead, lol. Where did those come from????? I don't smoke...
The picture of the two chicks!!!!! And Yes, change up the background any time you feel the need. I am all about change!!
Ok, thank god I am done and back at my aunts house to chill the fuck out! Anyway, I am leaving tomorrow in the very early AM to go back to California. I feel like my head is spinnning from all that went on at the retreat. I will email you about you as I cant have it come back to me. Anyway, did you take a picture of what your wearing today? You sound like you look gorgeous and sometimes thats all it takes to put us in the right frame of mind... Sometimes, that's all you got! So WTF happened with the muscles guy? What happened to the other guy, the Libra? Do you have any plans with him coming up? Let me know how the BBQ went today. Also, now that I am back and this retreat behind me I can work on the blog and putting it out there.
Oh... by the way, I read that guys blog you were talking about, the jack shit guy, he is fucking hilarious!!! I absolutely loved his post on "the comments you dont want to see on your blog" I thought that was great, he had me rolling. OK, so whats up with the job thing? Is today your last day? Have you heard back from target? What about the teaching position for summer?
Now I have a question for you. Your friend Jess, did you say she broke up with her girlfriend? I am totally o.k. with that stuff as my brother is gay and lives with his partner, which by the way I think he should leave, but I keep my big mouth shut, as my success rate in the relationship arena is pretty much zero! But she has kids right? If so, that is how my roommate is. Actually, I live with two gay guys which I absolutely love, because I get along great with them, none of us are ever home and I dont have to worry that they will try and be anything more than a good friend. My one roommate was married for a while and has twins, a boy and girl. They just turned 16. My other question is I remember seeing a girl in your pictures (sorry, but at first I thought it was a guy but then realized that it was woman because I would kill for that smooth skin!).
Anyway, I hope that Jess feels better, she must of really loved her to take 2 days off. We have all been in that place for one asshole or another. I am not a man basher or a partner basher, for me I absolutely love men, its just the ones you love the most cut your heart the deepest, so much so, sometimes you feel as though you almost cant breathe! Send me Jess' birth info and I will run her chart.
I am putting my plan together and I will post it soon!
That's what I feel like this morning! And I'm going to keep telling myself that all day, no matter how shitty I feel. Last night I pretty much told Muscles to fuck off. He's can be such an asshole, and I didn't even feel like dealing with that shit last night. I washed my hair before I went to bed last night, and got up this morning and flat-ironed it. I put on this cute, summery dress that I haven't wore in a while, and wore my hair down. I knew I looked good when my son told me I needed to go put on "work clothes", lol.
All morning everyone at work has been telling me how pretty I look, and I do feel it. The sun is shining again, and my mood is much better already. I am going to keep reminding myself all day that I am worth the effort to do whatever I want! And I can look in the mirror and feel good about ME!
Jess texted this morning and is a wreck. She took two personal days because she says she can't function. She broke it off with the girlfriend last week, and it heart-broken. So I think tonight I am going to go to the rescue. It will do some good to focus on her problems instead of my own for one night - if that makes sense. Isn't that what friends are for?
I know how you feel! Sometimes I feel like I am back at zero! Though I know I am not, sometimes it just feels like it, you know.
The thing is when it comes to relationships you want to get to a place where you choose to be a in a relationship because you want to be, not because you need to be. I know that lesson, trust me! I stopped doing that when my mom pointed out to me that I train-wrecked men. I realized because of my selfishness I was causing others pain and it wasnt fair, so I stopped doing it, it wasnt easy because I like companionship, but I knew in the end each guy would just be another casualty I would add to my ex-boyfriend graveyard. During the last two years, I have spent by myself, except with my hook-up but thats all it is, and its once a month, I cant even say its some passionate, romantic affair because its not.
You want to hear something really fucking lame? At night I play this game on-line called build it or u-build it, and I play it because its a time management game, and this sounds so fucking pathetic but I dont think about any issues, and it makes me tired. Its almost like I get a break from thinking. So stupid!
Your absolute resolve is contagious! So I'm going to jump on the wagon, too! I've decided that I need to make a few changes, too. For once, I really feel like I am in control of my eating. Good food has became a habit for me - just something I do. I don't really struggle with it like I used to. Yeah, I really felt uneasy when I heard about the pizza, but I'm SO OVER IT. Fuck that pizza! The party is tomorrow, but I know I won't eat any. My co-worker brought in donut holes yesterday, and I didn't even flinch! I even forgot to note that I did something I wouldn't have done in the past. It just wasn't a big deal. And they sat on the counter right beside me all morning - I didn't even think about them. And I know I'll say no to the pizza, too.
The past couple of days have been a little funky for me. I keep thinking that both of my guys are not as "into" me as I want them to be. And I am almost to the point where it is bugging me. I'm lonely - I know that's it. But I CAN NOT start this pattern of feeling like I have to be "involved" with someone! FUCK THAT! I am not doing that again. I don't need a damn man to make me feel valid! There are more men where they came from. I need to focus on ME!
My house is a fucking mess because I have been so unmotivated lately. All I do is go out, talk on the phone, text or chat, and bullshit around when I get home from work. There is SO much shit that I NEED to be doing. So I am going to take some notes from you and DO something. FOR ME! I can't go as far as I have with my weight loss and then let some other insignificant shit bring me down. I have so much better things to do with my time! It's time for me to take charge of my damned future again and RE-FOCUS! I'm going to write out a plan, too...
I am so proud of you that you made your goal, even before your birthday! I knew you would reach your goal and I knew you would keep going just like you are! You look great in your pictures! Not only that, but you look happy, very happy! You are look thinner and thinner in every picture you take, you have to be really feeling it now! I am sorry about your mom, it would be nice if parents could be parents, you know. My dad is the same way!
Thank you for your post. You know what really sucks, that life dishes pain out to everyone, life is totally equally opportunity when it comes to pain. It doesnt matter how pretty you are, or how thin, how smart, or even how much money you have your not exempt, I guess its like the IRS! Eventually you owe, you wanna play, you gotta pay! I have decided not to change my number, FUCK PETER PAN! I am not re-arranging my life for that prick! I am going to be like you and choose not to answser the phone or the email just as you choose not to eat the donut or the pizza! It's choice, this is something I am coming to understand. I still have not worked out and I feel like shit about it! I am so on track when I get back home, like a maniac back on track! I am writing out a whole fucking plan. I actually have a lot of work to do when I get back home.
I am supposed to go to this BBQ for dinner tonight, but I dont even feel like going! I have been up since 4:30 am working on our powerpoint presentation. I worked from 8 until 5:30 straight through no lunch, actually yeah... I had a lunch of champions... Small package of lays chips and a chocolate chip cookie. Both of them were totally nasty, but not as nasty as the chicken wrap I was given for lunch... So glad to get back home!
Tomorrow is my last day here and I will be back on my regular schedule on Thursday. Hope you had a great day today!
Chat with you soon!
He's a fucking asshole! How DARE he try to play you on a fucking text message! How RUDE! You are gorgeous, glamorous, and got it going on! You can have any damned man you want - so kick this fucker to the curb with his bitch-ass! You can do SO much better! And you're right, and I'm right with you on finding a "so-so". Fuck being head over heels in love, and fuck being treated like a doormat. I just want the "magic middle". Someone who can fuck my brains out, then leave me the hell alone, but still buy me stuff and treat me like a queen. Is that too much to ask?
My mom needs to be in a home somewhere. Her bank account is fine. I called the 24-hour banking line and they confirmed it must have been a scam call, which I already knew because when I checked her caller ID it said the call came from Quebec. But her cash is still gone, and we know my sister took it. But that's what you get when you let a crack-head stay at your damned house!
Did you seem my pics on the other page? That's a Tennessee lawn baby! It took me an 1:15 and I was sweating and breathing hard the entire time. And it wasn't even hot outside!
AND - guess who can fit her goal pants? And guess who doesn't like them now that they DO fit, and will most likely never wear them? That would be me...
Happened with your mom? Did you find out who took her money? Is your crack sister the skinny one you grew up with?
As soon as this retreat is over I am changing all of my numbers and email addresses... When I do I will send you all the new information. I am done, the game is finally over. Peter Pan can go fuck himself for life.
So, I get a text back from Peter Pan, who by the way I told his ass NOT to contact me anymore, so you know what the fuckin asshole says??? He says, "I know ur right and I am truly sorry but honestly I just wanted to tell you about my birth time. I also thought because we had been sort of "in touch" that it would be rude to just dissappear for awhile. Anyway, your right and I will not contact u unless I have clear intentions beyond what my poor actions have reflected. Love Peter Pan
Keep in mind my text said, I DONT WANT YOU TO CONTACT ME ANYMORE!! I didnt say not UNTIL, not LATER, I said ANYMORE!!!!! I told this fuck, it had now been two years and I didnt know who he was anymore, and this is not my not deal, and not an exercise that I need to go through as there are other men in this world that appreciate me for the strong woman I am and that he knew that to be true. All this shit was sent in text's, fuckin classic!! Seriously, I have been on both ends of the stick, I was married to a man that I didnt love for 8 years and that sucked! Then I spent 9 years wrapped in a relationship with a man I totally loved and that has blown too! Honestly, I dont anymore, maybe I am going to try being with someone who just thinks I am o.k., and I think they are just o.k., you know where it's mutual, because either way, the extremes suck!
These are the times that drive me to become something, to accomplish, to gain strength within and to be and let me tell you that is exactly what I am going to fucking do!
Wow... I would have never guessed you sound like fucking 20-year old supermodel! I am so not looking forward to every letting you hear my country-ass voice!
I like the name Kandee, and I also like the pink pill idea. I think trendy is good! You are in California!
I'm sorry you had to end up spending so much money on those clothes! Damn! And here I am complaining about having to buy some fucking $25 capri's, lol!
Ok, I'm off to my mom's house at 9 p.m. because she's a fucking idiot. Yesterday she discovered that she had $800 in cash missing from her purse. Why in the hell she had that much cash on her I don't know. But the only person who could have stolen it was my crack-head sister. Well, she just called hysterical because the bank just called her and told her all of her "funds had been depleted." Ok, don't they tell you on TV that banks never call you, and if they do to hang the fuck up? Well, you would think that since she parks her ass in front of the TV 24/7 she would know that. But oh, she also just discovered her debit card is missing.
SOOOOO, I am on my way over there to see what the fuck is going on, and am praying that her bank has 24-hour customer service. Who's the fucking parent here!?!?
I am staying at the Fairmont Hotel in Scottsdale, Arizona. I took some photos of my room and the pool... I gotta run because I have dinner in 1.5 hours and 4 powerpoint slides to put together for tomorrow AM's meeting! Chat with you soon!
This is the living room...
This is the shower...
This is my bed...
This is the pool, where I was for about 30 minutes...
Ok, the pizza party is in our classroom. They will be delivering 6 pizzas for the 10 kids plus myself and co-teacher. Remember, we're alternative/behavior so our students don't even get to go eat in the cafeteria. They were supposed to go OUT to eat, but they are so unpredictable we couldn't do it. But I think I have found a solution...
My daughter told me today they are having a grill-out at her school at the same time. So, since her school is across the street from mine, I am going to see if Greg will let me go over there while we are having pizza. There won't be any pressure to eat anything, and I can bring my salad if I want. By the time I get back, pizza will hopefully be gone.
I joined that site, but they still won't let me listen to the post until you accept my friend request.
Ok..... So this is what I got, so not worth it, and I am not in love with any of the outfits!
I got this black top, because the skirt is way to big, to this tight elastic around the waist will cover it up! Nice.....
I totally dont wear white because I bleed 365 days per year, so this is desperation!
This top goes so low that I have to wear another whit top underneath it, and the belt that came with it, well its soooo lame!
Again another "white" piece of clothing. I stay away from white, like you stay away from sugar...
This is the black dress, uumm... yeah... looks like I am going out on a date, uhh.. yeah which I am totally NOT!
This is what $400 bucks bought me!!! I am so hating it when the AMEX bill comes! So NOT worth it!!
Okay, so about the pizza party.... Is it pizza & salad? Im crossing my fingers that it is!! If that's the case, then I think you should put that spritzer in your purse and eat the salad. Every time you look at the pizza I want you to pretend that if you eat it, then you will have to give clyde a blow job! Hopefully, that isnt something that you want to do! AND.... if you dont eat it, you will give yourself an extra FIVE BUCKS for being strong..... You only have to do deal with the temptation for literally 60 minutes, right? Can you socialize with others during that time??? Your great at that!!!
My day has been pure insanity. Why would any sane person with 3 children volunteer to bring 4 more children home with her? Without Xanax or Prozac? Or Super Nanny? Oh, I thought I would be nice and do it since their mom was passed out and they didn't have food in the house. I also thought they would cancel soccer games because of the rain. No such luck. So here I am with 7 dirty kids on the soccer field for almost FOUR hours! I spent $10 just to get them something to drink since the sun came out and was baking our asses! So, I'm looking forward to getting them back home so they can play outside all day. Yeah - as soon as we pulled in the drive it started storming like crazy. So, needless to say I'm a fucking lunatic right now!
Yes, I am still going to see the Libra. He is only off work Sunday and Monday each week (was Mon. and Tues. but he changed it so we could spend more time together, lol). But I figure Aquarius can keep me company on the other days.
I can't wait to see your hair! All the work you put in - it almost sounds like what I have to do. That's why I've been wearing it curly lately. Much easier, even though I still have to add a ton of product to make it right.
I have already got positive feedback on my new blog layout. I just wanted something different. And I found another one I like better for this one, too. It's hot pink and black - very sexy! I might throw it up here, and if you don't like it we can always switch it back...
It is hot as hell in this desert! I cant believe I stayed here for 3 months in a row, two summers ago?? Girl, you are on a roll! A serious roll my friend!! Ummm.... yeah, the guy, I wouldnt have minded about the teeth myself, especially if we werent really exchanging many words! You know that you are totally on the right road when during a Mercury Retrograde you get your groove on with 2 different guys, that you actually want to get down with, a double date, and a concert during the work week and your still keeping up on your eating habits, at this point I dont know how you can do anything but smile!! Soooooo..... will there be a repeat performance? What about the Libra guy, will he perform this week for you? I am trying to think, I have never fucked an Aquarius.... at least not one that I can remember?
I love your blogs new look, LOVE, LOVE the pink on the yellow, and the happy background! Pink has always been my favorite color! In fact, I would eat pink eggs if they made them! I used to have 27 pink baseball hats, the ex always bought them for me, I wear them when I work out and run, and I always wore them on our boat. Everything was pink, bathing suits, wraps, even my bags... All my workout clothes WERE really cute pink tops (NOTE the word WERE). As soon as we split up, I literally threw out of every piece of pink clothing that I had, which left me with almost zero so I had to buy new, which I bought black! I decided I was no longer going to be a princess, but instead a sexy, sassy, strong, independent woman, and pink just did not represent that! So I cut all my hair off and bought all black, sexy chic stuff and I havent looked back. But deep down I am a girly girl! Anyway, I got my haircut and colored today, I will post a picture tomorrow and I have also downloaded an audio thing on my iphone and I am going to try out audio posts, ummm... yeah, especially when I am on the freeway in this state! Either people drive like shit, or I have driven on the freeways of Los Angeles for too long!
Girl, girl, girl... that's all I can say. I have had more sexual pleasure in the last week than I have in the past year! OMG! I am too old for this shit! I got to Muscle's house last night at around 10p.m. because I had to wait for Jess to get home to babysit. Our plan was to watch a movie - instead we watched stunt bike videos. Yeah, I know you're thinking WTF! But see, I knew what I was doing - trying to get that testosterone going! And it worked...
And he does not live THAT far away - about 30 min. closer than the other guy. But it was worth the drive, honey! Check this out...
Yeah... this is him, honey - five years ago. Add a little bear gut, and a little less definition and you get him now. I wasn't complaining at all! And look at those LIPS! Okay, so he doesn't pass the teeth test - he has a gap. But he smells good, his skin is great, and his other assets make me not give a flying FUCK about his teeth!
Yesterday was a great day eating-wise - 100% on plan. Today has been a little off b/c of getting back to Jess's house at 5 a.m., then having soccer until 2 p.m. But I've done well with food choices and drank a gallon of water so far!
